“The Jheri curl beard on the face of San Francisco Giants’ Brian Wilson is usually the main attraction of his overall look, but at last night’s ESPYs in L.A. all eyeballs suctioned themselves to his Spandex tuxedo and matching pencil dick cane.”
Brian explained his mess of an ensemble to the Washington Post like this:
“It’s a onesie, so it has built-in gloves that are a little dirty because I’ve been getting a little awkward here on the carpet. And I’ve got my cougar cane — my ‘plus one’ tonight.
And the socks came in the fan mail from a San Francisco Giants fan. You know who you are, thank you. It said: ‘Enjoy.’ That was the letter. And I’m currently enjoying them. Ninja socks.”
