Porn is often kinky. It shows gay men’s sexuality at its extremes. How many videos have you seen of a daddy elbow deep in boy, or of a stud tied up having his ass passed around the room? The truth is that gay porn is often people’s desires played out and exaggerated. Now, don’t get us wrong. Kink is hot. Kink is the spice of life, or should we say sex life. It’s where people lose their inhibitions and experience true pleasure.

That in mind, today is National Vanilla Cupcake day, and it reminded us that sometimes we need to appreciate the simple things in life. Not every hookup we have is going to involve getting pissed on, spanked, or having our nipples clamped. Sometimes vanilla sex is what happens and is exactly what we need.

That’s why we’re celebrating some of the best parts of vanilla sex. Here are just a few reasons vanilla sex can be great, too:

1. It’s intimate

Sometimes you don’t wanna get wrecked, you just want a good steady pounding. Vanilla sex can be intimate and sometimes we just need a little tender touch. Even if it’s a hook up, there’s nothing wrong with a tender moment between (relative) strangers.

2. If you’re bottoming it leaves you less sore.

Taking a tough pounding is just as tough on your body as you’d expect. Sometimes vanilla sex means you can have more sex, more often. If you don’t need time for your ass and legs to recover, you can use that time having more sex. It’s simple math, guys. Get with it.

3. Missionary is underrated

Sure, doggystyle is hot. The bottom gets to feel sexy with their ass out and gets to hear the sound of their ass slapping. The top gets a great view of their partner’s ass and back muscles. And cowboy is great too. The bouncing motion is satisfying, and the angles fit just right. All that said, missionary is still pretty awesome. First of all, you get to make out, and making out during sex can make it that much more intense. Second, the angle makes it easy to get nice and deep. Third, you get to watch your partner’s face as your rock their fucking world.

4. It’s Good Starting Ground

You don’t learn to ice skate and start with a triple axel. You don’t learn to swim by diving into the deep end. You don’t ace a test without studying. You get the idea. Before you can start tying people up, or sticking your fist in them, you need to learn the ropes (pun intended). Vanilla sex is a great way to get to know your partner a bit before you move on to more exciting things. More importantly, vanilla sex is a chance to get to know your own body and your own sexuality. You need to start with a foundation, then build from there.

5. Kink Wouldn’t Be Kink Without Vanilla Sex

If you didn’t feel sad would happiness be as enjoyable? Similarly, would kink be as fun and exciting if vanilla sex didn’t exist? Probably not. Kink is the spice of life, or in this case of sex lives, and vanilla sex is the less intense but more digestible base dish it gets sprinkled on. Not everyone is all-kink all-the-time, so vanilla sex makes every kinky experience that much more exciting and new. Isn’t that as good of a reason to appreciate it as any?

How vanilla do you consider yourself? Leave a comment down below.