Happy Chinese New Year! We’re pretty excited to ring in the Year of the Rooster, or as we prefer to call it – the Year of the Cock. This year will be full of hookups, especially if you’re making good use of your Squirt.org account. If things go your way you’ll be getting lots of cock, so we’ve put together a little guide to help you. Check out the 12 dicks you’ll probably see in 2017:

1. The Uncut Dick

Foreskin is the cocksucker’s playground. Pull it, lick it, stroke it, jerk it – foreskin can take oral sex to the next level. There’s something deeply satisfying about a nice, thick uncut dick. Find a nice uncut guy to blow and get a-“head” on your 2017 hookups.

2. The Cut Dick

Some dicks don’t come in their original packaging – and that’s sexy too. A nice hard cut dick can be pretty visually nice and be the canvas for a nice sloppy blowjob. Sucking an cut cock can require a bit more saliva, but when it comes to blowjobs – the wetter the better!

3. The Curve

Some dicks, just like guys, lean the other way. You might meet a guy with a solid left hook, or a guy who curves just right. Every dick is different and that’s what makes them great! Enjoy a cock with a little personality.

4. The Straight

Not all cocks swing one way or the other. Some dicks are a little more… to the point. There are nice parts about riding a straight dick – it hits you right in the good spot.

5. The Huge

For some guys bigger is better. And you’ll probably come across some big ones this year. Or maybe some big ones will cum on you!

6. The Small

Not everyone’s pants are packing, but small dicks have their charm. They don’t usually leave you in pain and you can take the whole thing no problem! Plus – if you’re a top, then his size doesn’t matter all that much.

7. The Really Small

Some guys are less well endowed but it doesn’t really make a difference. A hot guy is a hot guy, regardless of whether or not he’s whipping out an 8″ monster.

8. The Shooter

Some guys’ cocks really go the distance. They spray it, they don’t say it. They shoot and score.

9. The Dribbler

Some guys just ooze cum, but that’s hot too. Makes it easier to swallow!

10. The Rocket

You know a rocket when you see it. It’s wide and thick at the bottom and then tapers off to a thinner head – just like a rocket ship. Blast off!

11. The Hammer

This kind of cock is the opposite of the rocket, it’s narrower at the base but has a big, thick head. It definitely makes for a unique bottom experience – you get stretched out at first and then glide down after that.

12. The Veiny One

This cock is throbbing, pulsing, and ribbed for your pleasure. There’s something so manly about a thick, veiny cock.

What kind of dick did your last hookup have? Leave a comment down below. Happy Chinese New Year!