Trevor James is known as Doctor Cuddles – he specialises in cuddle therapy.

I caught up with Trevor to see if a bit of man-on-man intimacy is what I’m needing in my life.

The origin story

“I used to be an event producer and director, and spent lots of time away from home and from close friends…” explains Trevor, when I ask what led him to cuddle therapy. “I realised that there were many people – especially men – who went for long periods without any meaningful touch or connection.”

“When the time came for me to transition into a new, less stressful career, I began to explore touch and cuddle therapy and decided to take a course of study in the subject. I became a Certified Touch and Cuddle Therapist.”

“Cuddle Therapy is one of the services I provide, alongside massage therapy, social companionship, and private 1-on-1 tours of Los Angeles.”

“All of these come together in my quest to ensure men’s health and wellness through touch, connection, companionship and community.”

Getting to grips with Cuddle Therapy

“Cuddle Therapy is the use of touch and cuddling as an alternative wellness modality, and can be used alongside other mainstream therapies…” explains Trevor, when I ask him what Cuddle Therapy covers.

“Cuddle Therapy is particularly useful for people who are depressed or lonely, and for people who are recovering from trauma or PTSD, as well as people who are going through a divorce or breakup.”

“Cuddle Therapy is an intentional, mindful, nonsexual, partnered bodywork activity for the body and the soul. It empowers men through compassionate touch.”

“Cuddling and touch are crucial factors in our well-being. Cuddling – and, by extension, touch – is a natural antidepressant, relieves anxiety, and strengthens our immune system. The problem is, we’re not getting enough of it, and men are the most touch-deprived.”

“Cuddling can be a very intimate activity and so can help single people add intimacy into their lives without having to be sexual, and also help couples become more intimate even without sex.”

“It doesn’t help that touch and cuddling have been sexualized, and that homophobia makes men avoid meaningful touch altogether.”

How to tell if you’re touch-deprived

“If you’re not familiar with the signs, you may be touch-deprived without realising it…” says Trevor, as we discuss how to determine whether you need cuddle therapy.

“Touch deprivation leads to feelings of loneliness, depression, anxiety, stress, and sometimes a craving for sex – a craving that doesn’t seem to go away after casual sexual encounters.”

“Sometimes, touch deprivation shows up as an increase in aggressive behaviour, or you may be experiencing sexual dysfunction.”

A cuddle masterclass

“My favorite cuddle position is the Layer Cake…” confirms Trevor, when I ask which would be his favourite cuddle position.

“The Layer Cake is where one partner lies on top of the other like a weighted blanket. It can feel very comforting for the person on the bottom and very embodying and grounding.”

The cuddle therapy experience

“People come to cuddle therapy sessions for various reasons…” says Trevor. “I always start with a check-in, to notice how they’re feeling and to find out how they would like to feel by the end of the session.”

“While they’re in a cuddle therapy session with me, I want them to feel that they are seen, that they are taken care of, and that they can escape into the arms of another man with no guilt.”

Find out more about Cuddle Therapy

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