For international folks, you might understand what to expect at a gay sauna in Amsterdam like Gay Sauna Nieuwezijds. But now that we can once again scratch that travel itch, North American gay males are waiting for hot international guys to hop a plane and take a load at a local bathhouse near you.

While you might understand gay cruising rules at home, nobody wants a culture shock going to a Los Angeles bathhouse and realizing the same rules don’t apply. This piece will examine the differences between the US and the rest of the world and how you can prepare for cruising and bathhouse events.

How Does Sauna Cruising Differ in North America?

The good news is that bathhouses follow a fairly consistent format, wherever you are in the world. In many ways, the golden-age of bathhouses in the late-1970s was really driven by the emergence of the gay liberation movement in the United States – it was the North American bathhouses that really helped to define our understanding of the gay sauna experience.

However there are some anomalies. For example, in cities such as Los Angeles, there’s Korean spas – which emerged to meet the relaxation needs of the local Korean community. These establishments have a lot of the same facilities as a gay bathhouse – and they are quite sexual spaces – but they’re not as openly or overtly sexual as a venue that promotes itself as a gay bathhouse.

There are other cultural variations that you might encounter as you explore the bathhouse options in different parts of the world. Guys in the United States and Canada tend to be more likely to initiate a conversation with you – they like to talk – even if you’ve given them no encouragement, they will start to talk to you. You just have to go with it.

Also, there’s not really any widespread sauna culture in North America. If you think about the Nordic region, Scandinavia, and much of Europe, relaxing in a dry sauna is pretty much an everyday thing. Not so much for the North Americans so they have different attitudes to social nudity. This might translate to a guy in a sauna who keeps his towel tightly wrapped around himself to conceal his body. Don’t be offended, it’s just that they do things slightly differently.

How Do Sauna Amenities Differ Across Continents?

There’s no hard and fast rules about what you’ll find in a bathhouse in North America. It varies considerably between establishments depending on decisions made by the management.

There may also be local regulations that shape how specific bathhouses operate.

As in Europe, you’d generally expect a bathhouse to provide you with a locker and a towel. Beyond that, it’s a bit of a lottery. Some venues will have private rooms or cubicles, some will have a greater emphasis on pools and water features, some may be more sex focused with slings and glory-holes.

Most bathhouses offer some sort of communal space – whether it’s a bar or a cafe – but smaller venues may be more functional.

You might be looking at your bathhouse options and thinking – How do I get maximum results from my visit to a sauna? The main thing is to go in with an open mind, be prepared to explore and get a feel for the vibe of the venue, and don’t be in too much of a rush. Take your time and be open to the opportunities that might present themselves.

How Has Bathhouse Cruising Changed with Covid in 2023?

Health regulations may vary between cities, and each venue may take different approaches in terms of how they deal with health concerns such as Covid-19.

As a general rule, most venues have relaxed any specific Covid-19 prevention measures into their business-as-usual hygiene and cleanliness procedures.

You may find that hand sanitiser is more visible and widely available, and there has been a greater emphasis on disinfecting surfaces.

Many venues have had to rethink the ventilation of their spaces, as poor ventilation enhances the risk factor for the spread of a virus such as Covid-19.

How Do I Find Bathhouses Once I Arrive

Because of the specialist nature of bathhouses, online searching may not be the most reliable way to find what you’re looking for.

The Squirt.org Cruising Directory is a great starting point. Not only does this give you the details of the venues in your destination, there’s also updates and feedback from Squirt members to help ensure that you’re going to where the action is.

Putting the hookup apps to work is also a good strategy. Chat to local guys and ask them which bathhouse they recommend. Why not arrange to meet them there? It’s always a good idea to get to know the locals.

What is a Bathhouse Party?

Bathhouses will often have regular or one-off events that they host in the venue. This could be a regular foam party, or naked workouts in their gym, or a big theme night such as underwear or water-sports.

CumUnion provides a robust calendar of hot and steamy events in bathhouses worldwide and North America.

It’s worth checking the website of a bathhouse that you’re considering, just to see if they’ve got any events listed that you might be interested in. If the venue’s website isn’t particularly up to date, have a chat with the staff working at the sauna – they should be able to let you know which are the most popular nights.

If you’re contemplating your first time at a bathhouse, you may be better to steer clear of any big events and just check out the venue during normal operating hours. Busy events where the sauna is rammed with guys can be a little intimidating and overwhelming if you’re just getting your head around the whole bathhouse experience.

Which are your favourite bathhouses in North America? Which venues would you recommend to someone that was visiting your city? Jump into our comments below and share your perspective.

Written by Gareth Johnson

Ever wondered what Rihanna was talking about when she’s singing that chains and whips excite her?

She’s talking about the thrill of a bit of light BDSM – getting a bit kinky in the boudoir.

Gay bondage is the ideal way to bring a bit of spice and sizzle to your sexual encounters.

If this is new territory for you, we’re going to walk you through some of the bondage basics for bi-curious boys.

Why Should Gay Males Try Kink Bondage?

The world of BDSM is fascinating and complex and worth doing a bit of research about before you reach for the riding crop and start demanding that everyone call you Sir.

There’s a community and culture surrounding BDSM that needs to be respected.

For example, BDSM isn’t always about arousal or getting off. Sure, a lot of it is very sexy but not all kink or fetishes are sexual. Control, restraint, dominance, and submission can take all sorts of forms – many of which have nothing to do with penetration or ejaculation.

BDSM is all about exploring boundaries – understanding your own and respecting the boundaries of others.

The world of kink and fetish and BDSM often feels very polyamorous. Gender and sexuality can play a big role in your kinky sex-play, but the psychology of BDSM may mean that you’re less interested in the genitalia of someone if they’re bringing the energy and the attitude that you’re looking for.

What’s the Science Behind Wanting to Be Bound and Gagged?

Often what we’re looking for from a bit of kinky bondage play is the intensity of the experience. We want to really feel something.

There is some science to back that up – a recent study demonstrated that the way that our brain processes pleasure and pain is fairly similar. We’re looking for the endorphin rush that we get from an intense experience – blurring the line between pleasure and pain until we’re beyond caring which is which.

If you want to unpack the appeal of BDSM with your therapist, a good starting point is the role that control plays in our lives. There’s a common perception that we may be drawn to bondage play because we want to relinquish control. For example, if you’re a big swinging dick in the corporate world, there’s an incredible sense of freedom when you hand control over to someone else and let them take charge.

Or it may be something incredibly primal that appeals to us about bondage. Another study found that female participants who were bound, receiving stimulation, and following orders then showed increased testosterone. How that translates for those of us that like a bit of man-on-man action isn’t particularly clear, but this sounds like the kind of study we’d like to be part of.

Ultimately, the science behind the appeal of BDSM is a bit irrelevant – if you’re into it, that’s cool. Crack on and explore your kink.

How Can I Safely Try Bondage?

In the world of BDSM – at any level – you’re going to hear a lot about consent.

That’s not just some kind of woke political correctness in a post-#MeToo era, consent is the absolute bedrock on which all BDSM encounters are based.

When we’re talking about boundaries, it’s not just about how much your body can physically endure – it’s also about the guidelines that have been set for your kink encounter.

Having a safe-word is an obvious starting point. Go with a safe-word that’s easy to remember and easy to say. Don’t forget to tell your partner what your safe-word is.

A good bondage or discipline session doesn’t necessarily require a lot of gear or equipment, but having a well-stocked kit-bag at your disposal is going to increase your options for pleasure. You might need some bondage tape, rope, handcuffs, or other restraints to help you take control or hand control over to someone else. If you’re planning some penetrative play then you’ll need some decent lube.

Bound and Gagged: Trying Blindfold Kink

A basic blindfold is an easy and fun way to begin to explore some low-level bondage and control.

How do I work with a sexual partner to try blindfold sex?

Like most things in life, when it comes to introducing a blindfold into your sexual play, good communication is going to be really helpful.

Talking about it in advance is a good starting point. Just abruptly pulling out a blindfold and whacking it on your partner may sound spontaneous and fun, but it’s understandably going to raise some alarm bells.

Discussing in advance how it might go down is a great way to build a shared understanding of expectations and boundaries.

Assuming that you’re both on the same page, equip yourself with a blindfold. This could be something as simple as a bandana, or you can check out the enormous range of options at a speciality fetish store.

Once you’re getting down to business and the blindfold is on – remember to get all of their other senses tingling. Touch is key here – explore their body, use your lips, tongue, and unexpected textures and temperatures. Hot tip – an ice-cube on the nipple is always going to get them tingling.

Take your time, move slowly, be in the moment together.

What’s the science behind a Blindfold Kink?

It’s not difficult to appreciate that if you’ve got a blindfold on then your other senses are going to be working overtime to compensate. The science backs this up – in one study around blind people, the part of the brain usually used for vision can be hijacked by other senses, resulting in improved hearing and touch, for example.

When it comes to sex, the blindfold is creating a different and unexpected dynamic – heightening your experience of the sensations that your body is feeling.

Why do some people like being gagged during sex?

Bondage play in sexual encounters is all about the power dynamics between the two of you. Adding a gag into the mix is another way to shake things up a bit and physically demonstrate who is in charge of what’s going down.

Being gagged feeds into our submission fantasies – you’re unable to speak, heightening your sense of helplessness.

There’s lots of different types of gags that you can experiment with. The ball-gag is often referred to – this is a round ball, secured in the mouth with a strap. There’s also gags that keep the mouth open so that oral sex is still possible.

Experienced kinksters may use the blindfold, ball-gag, and restraints all at the same time – delivering effortless domination and control.

Obviously, this is all done with consent. If you’re using a ball-gag then it’s important to find an alternative way to communicate your safe-word – you’ll need to agree a non-verbal cue.

Use Squirt.org to Find a Consenting, Fuckable Adult

If you’re not sure where to find someone ready and willing to experiment with their kinky side, head over to Squirt.org, where it’s easy to find another guy who knows precisely what you like and is happy to submit to whatever you crave.

From IM chats that can help you find the right partner to our video chat that can allow you to test this out virtually before giving the real thing a go, log on to find men that share your kink.

Written by Gareth Johnson